Beer Sheba

Went to Beer Sheba today to get shmitta vegetables.
Only the veggies that came from foreigners would do.
And in going I viewed the landscape - rough, miles of sand
intermingled with clumps of wild plants, and in between
the acacia trees, a few palms and as things would be had
did see camels. And it's 40 km's roughly from where I
lay my head to where I needed to be going. And the crocs
I have had for the last year give or take are worn till there's
no tread and walking is hard anyway. But I needed a break
from the break in my skull from 3 weeks ago that still hasn't
healed, slow bleed maybe, and the ulcer my cat has, and the
slowly being poisoned by the burning garbage across the road
that is the city dump. A break. Some exercise that is needed.

And so to shopping, eyes down. And to walking eyes down.
And the noises I hardly hear outside maybe because I'm
bombarded from all angles and completely numbing is
the tactic. Went for shitakes after - walked a long time
in the hottest heat. Was hoping to meet a Black Hebrew.
I might have seen a Saudian refugee. No shitakes. Got
some other kind of shroom. It's the 3rd time I went to
a place that carries them and nothing. Pissed. They help
stretch an otherwise bland meal/soup whatever. Got on
minibus, went back all in 3 hours from start to finish.
Don't like traveling on Fridays. Came back - already feeling
depressed just coming into this place. Walked in apartment,
and felt the stagnancy. All this week I am here like a shut in
and I didn't feel it. Left, came back and felt it. Aired out everything.
Changed bedding. Washed floors. Looked for cat - cat has escaped.
Sick cat out there. What else is new. He was waiting for his opportunity.
Now I am regrouping. Didn't sleep last night at all.
Drank too much wine. I have tempeh.
I am tired.
Real tired.
Just want to go to sleep for a long time.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Yeru-Shalayim

Didn't sleep last night. A total haul to make myself available to Jerusalem and git there. Physically. Just make the bus that involves walking distances, getting to another city and then waiting for the bus. Had my schedule. Started out at 4:00 am. Just to be sure. Then went into automatic. Dressed in paint spattered clothes (on the inside - but still I knew), found other odds and ends to don myself with. Wrapped my head in a scarf and mandatory sunglasses and hit the road at 7 something. Arrived at the next destination - waited another 10 minutes - bus came and we hit the road. I can't BEGIN to tell you - how utterly blown away I felt at FINALLY LEAVING this place and heading UP. It's been a LONG, dragged out, bloody, dusty, fiery, angst-ridden, pathetic time here and leaving it after a year and not seeing Jerusalem for almost 2 - well I was riveted to the window taking it all in, praying that the green trees, my pines, my blessed pines would remain with me as memory. The...
Read more

Heart Palpitations - Severe Panic Attack

I managed to drive myself into a full-blown panic attack. Mati is not eating, I went out to some neighbors to find an IV set, nobody had one, had one that was used at home, went back, Mati was outside, she entered not before I tried to give her something to eat, she took one bite and started to meow. I went into panic, administered her IV subq, she went outside again. In between preparations for Shabbat, everything from clothes, to salad, to cholent, to making her a slurry, to preparing colloidal silver to actually sewing together 3 blankets I managed to score at a thrift shop so that when people come over to sit on my sofa that I made, that it would be more comfortable. I sewed them together then folded everything and sewed it into half so the cushioning would be more. Now my heart is beating so fast. I tried everything from minerals to wine to weed, to breathing to not thinking now will pray. Shabbat Shalom of healing
Read more

Evil Eye Jewish Voodoo

Image
I've been living in a place that puts the evil eye on people then hires other people to take the curse off. Case in mind - I now live in a house of the official curse remover of the region who passed on from this world about 15 years ago. Dahab Megidish. That was his name. Renowned all over for his abilities in removing evil eyes, curses and anything of the darkness that would stick to a person and render them incapacitated. Since moving in - my cat was mauled, I've been beseiged with all kinds of illnesses, I broke my foot, I fell prey to all sorts of misfortunes and just a few minutes ago lost consciousness, hit my head on the wall, bleeding and feeling sick. Not going to the hospital - so please don't harp on this. At least till some other symptom arises aside from the bleeding, pain and general feeling sick. Do energies get stuck in the walls of a place? Yep. Do I feel that the energies are stuck in this place? Yep. Do I feel that the energies are all around this place?...
Read more